An Empty Bliss Beyond This World

Embrace Humanity

I have been having some really stellar feelings lately toward human beings. And I am ordinarily doing everything I can to transcend my humanness because it seems so limiting. But, I think I was laying around in my bed one day waiting for sleep to take me when a bunch of images started to flash through my head. Little portraits of my life - what is, what has been, and what could be. And I think the epiphany was that the journey out of suffocating myself with ideas and anxieties and other nonsense is a journey directly through every single one of my living human relationships. It is not enlightenment first, then humanity. The two are one. And suddenly I’m standing in a room - my life as it is now. It is a box in many many ways. Certain things are predictable. Certain things are unapproachable or unlikely. But this is precisely the attitude of the box! I conceive of things, but they are outside of my room and I’ve locked the door outward because I am a little bit frightened of the other side. But I figured something out today when I was working out. All you have to do is project your mind to the other side and play out the scenario as if you were free of fear and free of self-limiting concepts and ideas. So I just put myself on the other side of the box and I felt much better! And this existential angst will nag me on and on, but I love it. It’s a part of me. It drives me toward mystery and understanding. And I think this other part drives me toward being completely human.

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